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We have already seen how evolution may influence attraction and sexual selection. We have also seen why this may not apply to our lives today. In an age of online dating and casual relationships, what other factors influence attraction and why?
Each year, people send 132 million winks on Match.com and members go out on six million dates.¹ But why do these people send winks and go on dates?
Some psychologists argue that self-disclosure is the key to attraction. This means that partners must share personal information to develop a romantic relationship.
Others see physical attractiveness as a key influencing factor. In this explanation, we will focus specifically on the Halo effect theory and the matching hypothesis. We will discuss Filter theory as a factor affecting attraction wherein people put potential matches through a series of filters in order to assess their compatibility.
This is the idea that attraction occurs by sharing information with a partner, information about yourself that you may not feel comfortable sharing with anyone else. When a person shares personal information with another one, this indicates that they feel secure with and trust their partner.
Self-disclosure leads to greater intimacy, which brings more satisfaction to the relationship. Altman and Taylor (1973) developed this idea with their Social penetration theory. This theory states that self-disclosure must gradually increase over time in depth (more personal information) and breadth (larger amount of information) for a relationship to be successful.
A couple sharing information - StudySmarter Originals.
Physical appearance influences attraction in a number of ways. Although on face value you may think that people are attracted to physically good-looking people just because they are good-looking, in reality, psychologists have theorised that physical attractiveness links to evolutionary needs for survival (e.g. being physically fit means you can evade predators).
Did you know? Psychologists at the University of Pennsylvania studied data from over 10,000 speed daters and found that most people make a decision regarding a person’s attraction within three seconds of meeting.²
Two explanations of why physical attractiveness affects attraction are the halo effect and the matching hypothesis.
This is the belief that people who are deemed physically attractive have more positive traits than less attractive people. In a study by Dion et al. (1972), physically attractive people were rated to have more positive personality traits. Dion et al. called this the ‘beauty-is-good’ stereotype.
According to Hatfielt et al. (1966), when people choose a partner, they don’t automatically go for the most attractive person they can find. They tend to find a partner that is similar to them or ‘matching’ in physical attractiveness. This way, they can still find the most attractive partner they can attain while avoiding rejection.
Filter theory, established by Kerckhoff and Davis (1962), states that people narrow down their selection of prospective partners by putting them through a series of filters. There are three levels of filters:
1. Sociodemographic characteristics: these are physical proximity (if they live close to us), level of education, social class, religion, etc.
2. Similarity of attitudes: this is if prospective partners share the same fundamental beliefs as us, such as if they think family is important.
3. Complementarity: this is when partners have traits that balance each other out. For example, if one partner is very indecisive and the other likes to take charge and make decisions, they complement each other.
Fun fact: Couples usually wait for six to eight dates before they are willing to enter into an exclusive relationship. ³ Could this be the time it takes to go through the filters of Kerchoff and Davis’ theory?
There are three main factors affecting attraction: self-disclosure, physical attractiveness, and filter theory.
Self-disclosure is sharing information about ourselves with others. This indicates that you feel secure with and trust your partner, which leads to greater intimacy and satisfaction in the relationship.
Physical attraction influences attraction. Two explanations of this are ‘the halo effect’ and the Matching hypothesis. The halo effect is the belief that people who are physically attractive have more positive traits than less attractive people. The Matching hypothesis proposes that people tend to find a partner that is similar to them or ‘matching’ in physical attractiveness.
Filter theory states that people narrow down their selection of prospective partners by putting them through a series of filters. These are sociodemographic characteristics, the similarity of attitudes, and complementarity.
Sources
Match.com
Kurzban and Weeden, HurryDate: Mate preferences in action, Evolution and Human Behavior, 2005.
Factretriever.com
Self-disclosure, physical attractiveness, and filter theory.
Self-disclosure, physical attractiveness, similarity of attitudes and complementarity (to name a few)!
Personal appearance, proximity, similarity, and complementarity.
Personal appearance, proximity, similarity, and complementarity.
Psychologists debate what the most important factors affecting attraction are. Some think that physical attractiveness is most important, others think that complementarity is key. Others think that self-disclosure is important.
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